No idea...

I have stop writing for a while, basically is because I have nothing to write. Nothing comes into my head, my mind is blank and my life is greyish but I won't said its dead. At this point, I don't understand why my whole body is feeling numb for the whole week. I can't perform the usual 100% of me. Sigh** I can't even pick myself up to go to gym in the morning.. I kept giving myself excuses that I need rest and I will do it tomorrow.. but when tomorrow came.. I again push it away till this sunday.. Wow!! I have break the record of not going to gym for a week.. What a great record!

Sigh** Beside breaking that record, I have broke another record.. I nearly went drinking for a week.. me was having this urge to drink .. not drink for enough but drink to get myself high. I don't know why I do this, but my heart is right now feeling empty, feeling lonely.. just like air supply song, All out of love.. Moday I went to Harry bar for a drink. I sat at one corner drinking quietly while trying to concentrate on my book that I have started off writing.. sad to say I can't think of anything thus I finished my beer and I went over to my favourite place Balacava and hoping to find some familiar faces.. Too bad the usual people were not there but except the usual bartender, I again have a few drink before I decided to head back home. On Tues, it was my off and I again went to New Asia Bar for a drink as they are having happy hour from 3pm-9pm.. On wed.. I went to clarke quay and drank a few liquor and wine.. On thurs same thing happen, and drank the same thing that I have on wed.. and finally on FRI came.. i started feeling very strange.. My energy is totally drain off.. feeling weak.. and sometime I do feel giddy. I really do not know what is happening to me.. I can't believe that this is happening to me.. first time in my life I felt so weak physically and mentally. Seriously, I do not know why I am feeling like this. Even typing this blog I took almost an hour and a half to complete it.. this is pretty long. Sigh I hope the next week .. I be fine and recuperating..